Our minds are powerful things that control our whole experience of life. And when that powerful thing turns against you it can be one of the scariest things. You start to question everything. And you can end up in very dark places.
For me I felt like my mind had turned against me when I became depressed whilst pregnant and then again after the birth of my second child. I am still currently battling post-natal depression, everyday trying to find ways to lift the fog and pry those claws away from my fragile mixed-up brain. Sometimes I feel like I am drowning in the darkness, unable to breathe as I get dragged into a whirlpool cycle of negative thoughts. Not every day is that bad but it is incredibly difficult and I cannot do it alone, although my PND has tried its best to isolate me.
Someone said to me before something along the lines of “Why would you want to talk to people who also suffer? Surely it will just make you worse?” And I completely understand where this thought process is coming from. If all of us suffer from something so difficult and dark surely we are just balls of depression bouncing off each other. But they could not be more wrong!
It may surprise you but the ladies I talk to are some of the most positive people I have spoken to, just oozing kindness and compassion and sharing with others, with honesty and heart. They all inspire me everyday with their words of wit and wisdom and even on my darkest days they seem to find ways to lift my spirits. I am so so grateful for the lovely #pndfamily on #pndchat and #pndhour (if you don’t know what I’m talking about look it up on twitter!) and other PND and PP mums who have followed me and shared their stories on their blogs.
So really I think this post is just a massive THANK YOU to them all! You are beautiful, inspirational people. And if you haven’t already, one day we will win this. Taking it one step at a time, one day at a time, together.